My Life With Twins: Family Help
A year ago this week our life changed. I went in for a routine mid-pregnancy ultrasound and came home with a high risk twin pregnancy.
I was shocked, I was thrilled, I was scared, I was overwhelmed, I felt so blessed.
I felt all of these things at the same time. And then the worry set in.
How was I going to care for four busy sons and two potentially premature infant girls? What if I had to have a c-section? Were two crying babies going to keep the whole family awake?
The Rev. is a pastor (with a name like The Rev. this comes as no surprise to most of you!). As a result of this calling, we live far from family. We also live in a modest three bedroom home. There is not a lot of extra room for extended visitors. We also live in North Dakota, which is not a vacation destination, especially in the deep winter.
I was pretty sure that the Rev. and I would be managing the twins on our own.
You know what? We did just fine.
My cousin came out to spend my last week or so of pregnancy with me, to keep my mind off of my impending labor and to help keep the household afloat. She was also a great labor coach alongside the Rev., and she has the fingernail scars on her wrists to prove it.
Once the babies came home, the Rev. returned to work. The big boys went back to school.
I was alone. In my house. With two tiny babies.
And I no longer felt frightened. I no longer felt worried. I did not even feel overwhelmed.
I felt powerful and accomplished!
I had all kinds of people cooking dinner for us, so all I had to do was focus on our new little family of eight.
The girls don’t know that all of the books insist on a live-in grandma or nurse. All they know is that their mom loves them fiercely and that their dad melts into a puddle of mush when they are in his arms and that their brothers are an endless source of entertainment.
This past week, the girls turned eight months old. The Rev.’s parents came to spend 10 days with us. The girls enjoyed their grandparents. I can’t lie, I enjoyed the occasional chance to run to the store without my “assistants”. I liked that grandma could cuddle one while I fed the other and both babies could be comforted at the same time. At the same time, I also enjoy today, when life returns to normal and our little family of eight can once again settle into our routines.
How much family help did you receive when your multiples were born? Was it enough? Was it too much? How could it have been better?
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