My friend genny wrote a post about her family creed and how it helped her teach her children right from wrong. She pointed out how at one point it was super important to repeat the words almost daily, and as her children got older, the words had an imprint on them and less repetition was needed.
This morning I realized that I am finally a full time stay at home mom again! It is totally official. The other day, after feeding Emily in the NICU I stopped downstairs to pre-op to say hi to the co-workers. My manager was there, so I took the time to sign my paperwork terminating my position. I could have stayed on as help-out status, but really…I’m not in the mood to help out at this point. If I ever decide to go back, I’ll reapply…they’ll take me back!
I’ve been home full time since the beginning of November when I measured full term. But I was at home on modified bedrest. We ate a lot of take out. I had to let the house really slide. I had to focus on growing healthy babies. I think I did a pretty good job. I carried twins to 38 weeks, and could have gone longer, if I was not so terribly uncomfortable and if were deemed beneficial. I’m actually thankful they were born when they were, my brain keeps going back to the tracheal web that Emily was born with and I wonder if it would not have grown thicker the longer she was in the womb? We’ll never be sure. What I am sure of is that there was a miracle that took place a week ago today, God spared Emily’s life and I will be forever thankful.
So, now that I’ve had a few good nights of new mom sleep (which is not like regular sleep…but is new normal for new moms), I feel so much better…and I feel like a full time mom again. I feel like I can have a bit more patience with my older children and I am feeling like a slightly better manger here at home. It is going to take me a while to establish and re-establish my routines, but for now, I’m happy that my bed is made and the breakfast dishes are done…the laundry is under control again, finally.
I know that I will still have crazy days ahead of me where I will struggle, and my hormones still make me cry for no real good reason…but for now, I am embracing full time momhood again! This is the vocation I have truly been called to, and I am rejoicing in the privilege of mothering six beautiful children…what an awesome responsibility and what a rewarding opportunity!
Soli Deo Gloria!
I know people are wondering, and after last week, I can hardly believe it myself, but I am still pregnant. 36 weeks 4 days pregnant to be exact.
I am so pregnant that my clothes no longer fit…none of them. Everything looks silly or feels tight, and usually both.
I am so pregnant that I either sleep really well, or I don’t sleep at all. there is no in between.
I am so pregnant that my chest looks small. I’m gifted in the chest department…so that is a pretty big deal.
I am so pregnant that my kids are pretty sure that at this point I’ve just gained a lot of weight, that there are no babies coming.
I am so pregnant that my stretch marks have stretch marks.
I’ve been pregnant longer than this…but this STILL feels like my longest pregnancy.
I’ve been through stressful situations in all of my pregnancies, but I think this time tops it all. So now I’m to the point where all I can do is trust in God, and focus on my primary vocation:wife and mother. I’ve enjoyed Christmas break and getting to snuggle in with the little ones and read them lots of books. I’ve played video games with the big one and listened to all of his technical jargon. I’ve looked at the drawings and creations of the middle one and got to enjoy watching that glimmer in his eye. My kids rock!
These girls are going to be awesome too. If nothing else, they prolong the empty nest for a few more years!
I know that I can’t freeze time with these guys, but there are days that I just want to, when look at them and say “it just doesn’t get better than this.”
But you know what? A year later you look on the same kids and say the same thing…which means that it does just keep getting better…even with the mess, and the rolled eyes and the holey socks, and the stinky hair, they still are God’s wonderful gift to me (and to the Rev as well!)
So at this point..I can look at my swollen tummy and at my bags packed and ready for the big day…whenever that may be, and I can say “it just doesn’t get better than this” and know for certain that it really will be better than this…and I’m going to love every minute of it!
Once a upon a time, when I was a stay at home mother of but one or two young charges and for about the five days during this time period in which I was not pregnant and sluggish, I had a company ready home. You know what I am talking about. I had the type of home in which I did not have to apologize to anyone who would show up at the door unannounced.
People aske me all the time if I knew I was having twins before that BIG ultrasound. My not so simple answer is, yes and no.